Episode Transcript
How often do you sit down and listen to your internal dialogue? Today, I want to talk about why turning inward with a positive mind is so important and what’s the best way to start the process. Welcome to Making Friends With Depression.
Hello friends, and welcome back to another edition of Making Friends with Depression. I am your host, Charles Minguez.
Quickly at the top of the show, I’d like to take care of some housekeeping. If you enjoy the show, please rate and review it on whatever podcast platform you listen on. It really helps drive the show up the charts.
You can also support the show by picking up some Making Friends With Depression merch. There are some really cool hoodies, t-shirts, and mugs. Finally, you can become a patron for as little as $1 a month and get a shout-out at the end of the show.
You can find links for the merch store, Patreon, etc., in the show notes and over at Making Friends With Depression dot com.
Now for the show disclaimer. I like giving a bit of history and a disclaimer so listeners know why I’m doing this and where I’m coming from.
First, the history.
I’ve lived most of my life with major depression and schizoaffective disorder. I was first diagnosed at 13, and I’m now in my 40’s. In fact, this April, I’ll be 42. So, mental illness and wellness have been a big part of my life.
I have studied mindfulness for 20 years. I started with yogic philosophy with Dr. Bob Butera at the Yoga Life Institute. Over time, I found my way to Buddhism. I even taught beginner meditation classes.
As a Peer Support Specialist, I volunteered my time with the National Alliance on Mental Illness, also known as NAMI, and facilitated meetings for adults experiencing poor mental wellness.
My story, plus my lived experience, is something that I hope others find inspirational. My motivation, however, is to give back and help others. This podcast is one way that I can do that.
Listen, I’m not a therapist or a counselor. The content on this show is not meant to be taken as medical advice. I’m only trying to inspire hope by sharing my story and the techniques that helped me during my healing process because I think you’ll find them helpful too.
For today’s show, I want to talk about why sitting and listening to your internal dialog is important. One technique that can help us get more comfortable sitting with the internal dialogue is meditation. One of meditation's many beautiful gifts is letting us sit down to get interested in what’s going on internally.
Sitting With the Internal Dialogue
It’s vital to tune in regardless of whether or not you have a monkey mind or a negative internal dialogue. We must get comfortable being with ourselves as we are, with no judgment, goal, or attachment to an outcome. Meditation can help with this.
When we just sit with who and what we are, with no attachment, we naturally begin to pay attention to what’s bubbling up to the surface of our mind.
As we feel more comfortable just sitting, we can analyze what’s going on internally and begin to make subtle changes addressing any monkey mind or negative internal dialog. Or celebrating and enjoying moments of joy.
The Breath is the Key
Sitting down while focusing on your breath is one of the easiest ways to start this process and unlock the mind. When you take the time to practice, get really excited about it. Enjoy being with yourself. Enjoy just breathing.
You can focus on the breath for one minute, five minutes, ten minutes, or more. The length of time doesn’t really matter. What matters is that you’re creating new habits and generating a consistent effort to get it done.
If you’re unsure how to start and looking for a quick five-minute breathing meditation, look no further. I have one for you to listen to and will link it to the show notes.
What’s All That Noise?
As you practice more and more, focusing on the breath and focusing on being with yourself, you will begin to notice the monkey mind. Maybe you never really noticed it before.
Suppose we don’t develop this habit of just sitting. In that case, there are too many distractions in our daily life that pull us away, and we never really pay attention to the monkey mind or negative internal dialogue.
That is, until it’s too late, and you’re forced to pay attention, whether that’s having a breakdown, not feeling 100%, or a flare-up with your depression or mental illness.
The Muddy Water Jar
I’d like to share an analogy with you. It comes from Buddhist teachings, but you don’t have to be Buddhist to understand.
On a table, there’s a jar filled with water. On the bottom of the jar is dirty sediment. If the jar is undisturbed, the water is pure and clean. You might even drink it. However, when the jar is shaken, the dirt swirls from the bottom, polluting the pure nature of the water.
After the jar is shaken and put back down to rest, the dirt will fall back to the bottom, revealing the nature of pure water.
Before we begin this practice, our mind is like the polluted water. We can’t seem to find its pure nature. But when we let it rest, the pure nature is revealed.
Productive Conversations with Your Internal Dialogue
It’s really, really important to create this healthy habit as a check-in for yourself. Why? Because as the emotions arise, the negative internal dialogue appears, you then begin to create space between yourself and those feelings.
When you create that space, you stop identifying with those emotions and feelings as if they were intrinsically a part of yourself. You go from, “I’m an angry, depressed person” to “I’m a person experiencing anger, experiencing depression, etc.” There’s a big difference between those two ways of identifying.
The mind wants you to buy into the idea that the negative emotions and internal dialogue are part of who you are, which is a lie. When you buy into those ideas, it becomes a snowball effect, and it’s challenging to get away from it as it chases you around.
A Tool to Manage Your Inner Voice
This practice is a tool. I’ve used it many times in my life to combat the negative internal dialogue. Having this tool ready to use has helped me gain perspective. It’s about creating that safe space between yourself and your emotions.
It’s not going to happen overnight. But if it does, good for you! Either way, it’s a great idea to start creating this healthy habit.
When you’re living with mental illness, anxiety, or depression, it can often feel like things are out of control. This one practice is one small way to regain some of that control. Start today and be excited about it.
The more you do it, the easier it becomes. Get excited about exploring your heart, your mind, and your emotions. Yes, it can seem scary, but the reward of doing the work is feeling refreshed on the other side.
If you put together a practice and try it out, let me know by emailing or leaving a comment. Don’t forget to check the show notes for the five-minute breathing meditation.
Support the Show
Thanks for being here. I appreciate you listening. If you’d like to learn more about what was discussed in today’s episode, visit my website, Making Friends With Depression. You’ll find today’s show notes and resources.
Also, help me spread the word about Making Friends With Depression by sharing this episode with a friend today!
Consider supporting the show by picking up some merch or becoming a Patron. You can visit the Making Friends With Depression Merch and Patreon pages in the show notes or at Making Friends With Depression dot com.
Until next time friends, and many blessings!